Phobia (Alas! The original version!)
by Mido-Sama
Summary: 1x2, 3x4x5, yes... very cute and humor filled! READ READ! YES READ! lol, its the original version!


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Did you say Phobia?

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By: Mido-Sama

"No WAY!" Duos voice cracked. "You dont have Anthrophobia too? Do you?" Heero shook his head quickly and backed away from the garden Wufei was so diligently tending. "Aw man- the hot new silent guy in school is afraid of flowers! HAHA! There goes the 'Strong Silent Type' description of the infamous Heero Yuy!" Heero shot Duo a quick death glare doing nothing. "Alright, lets list your Phobias why dont we?" 

"No need for that Duo!" Heeros eyes screamed that he was serious this time. Wufei just laughed at the lovers quarrel... but they weren't lovers if they didn't have sex.. where they? Wufei shrugged and guessed that Heeros Caligynephobia was good for Duo since all of those pretty girls were always all over him at school... if you can call fake looking boobs that got in the way ALL the time and a bubble asses that just slammed themselves in your face pretty- none the less, Heero feared them. He also had Chiraptophobia, but Maxwell rid him of that fear- now he touches him all the time! One of Duos arms was always swung around Heeros signature hips or if the were sitting Duo was always practically on Heeros lap snuggling close to the boy. It was only a matter of time before Duo broke him of his Erotophobia. Wufei laughed as he watched the two reenter the mansion, Duo sure had a lot of patients... but then again- so did Quatre and Trowa, for putting up with himself. Speaking of which, where were they? Wufei, not wanting to miss out on any new interesting things went to look for his mates, he wasn't the one who had a fear of sex... but he did have one phobia... one no one would ever know of- not even Quatre and Trowa... EVER!

At dinner that night Wufei, Quatre, and Trowa seemed very... pleased and in a very good mood. Heero was doing well too... except the fact that every day at dinner they listed his Phobias, it wasn't his fault was it? Oh well, as usual the topic came about in the same order.

"Why dont you have some peas Heero? Instead of just eating carbohydrates and meat?" Quatre handed Heero the bowl of peas.

"No thanks." He simple said.

"How about Carrots? We have some Tofu! Or you could have some salad, its Iceberg today, with vinaigrette, my personal favorite! Try some!" Quatre tried again.

"No thank-you Quatre."

"Alright... I tried." Quatre slumped back into his chair and laid his head on Wufei's shoulder. "Want to feed me Wu-Chan?" Quatre giggled mischievously while scooting his 'Rojo Diablo' red wine closer to the Chinese pilot and handing the him piece of Toasted Rye bread. "Please?" Although you would think so Trowa didn't mind, he knew his turn would come- besides, he had an entire three hours with just He and his Little Angel, he actually quite enjoyed watching Wufei and Quatre play together- it was arousing, and sexy, and so innocent at the same time! On the other end of the table Duo and Heero were starting their usual argument.

"Why dont you eat vegetables Heero?" Duo asked kindly pecking at his salad.

"You know I have a Lachanophobia!" Heero answered calmly and matter-of-factly.

"Oh, quit this shit and your damned phobias!" Duos face went bright red. At this time Wufei gently stopped feeding his smaller lover and they sat intently waiting to be pulled into the fight. "Quatre, dont you agree?"

"Agree with what?" Quatre was a bit upset about being interrupted- as was routine- but he was to kind to be rude. 

"That Heero needs to get over his phobias!"

"Yes, I agree." Heero slumped into his chair. "Some of them are quite ridiculous." Quatre offered to protect his argument. "I mean, Japanophobia? God Heero- you ARE Japanese! And Hagiophobia? Saints and Holy things? What came to this Heero? Must I go on?" Quatre was stunned, he never said so much before to the poor soul in front of him.

"We all have Phobias." Heero argued.

"True, but we dont flash them around like you do."

"I just know my Phobias." He added.

"I have no phobias!" Wufei sniffed hugging his blonde Koi.

"Yes you do."

"I do not."

"You have to! Every one does!"

"I am not everyone."

"Are too."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am not."

"Too."

"Not."

"Too."

"Not."

"Too."

"Not."

"Too."

"Too." Trowas voice interrupted the consistent dispute.

"What?" Heero was in shock, Wufei as well- Trowa never came into this- ever.) Duo smiled at this. 

"You are too."

"I am what?" Wufei acted stupid.

"You are too Human you do to have a Phobia!"

"What is it then?" Wufei let go of Quatre and glared at his taller lover.

"Oneirogmophobia." Trowa stated simple with a small wave of his hand.

"What's that?" Quatre asked innocently. Wufei's eyes grew wide, Trowa had known- but HOW? How in the name of Shinjigami did Trowa of all people know? "What is it?" Quatre asked again, Trowa remained silent.

"Trowa, what does that mean?" Duo asked quickly. Wufei gave Trowa a saddened look as though his entire being and life was in Trowa hands.

"Because I love him, I will not say." Trowa read Wufei's plea to not tell.

"Aw, T-Man, that sucks!" Duo complained.

"Your such a great guy!" Quatre hugged the banged love for his kindness to the Chinese boy he also loved. 

"Its the fear of wet dreams." Heero blurted out.

"WHAHAHAHAHAHAHAT?" Duo was half laughing half screaming as he heard the words coming out of Heeros mouth. "The fear of what?" Wufei grew a bright red color and his eyes began to tear. 

"The fear of wet dreams." Heero was truly heartless, Duo was convinced. But he loved the heartless bastard for it.

"haha, that's great! At least my Phobia isn't that embarrassing!" Duo mocked.

"Dont be so sure Duo." Trowa yelped, he had to protect his embarrassed lover. "You are a victim of the great and all powerful Phronemophobia!" Trowa screamed at him, yet still talking in his usually calm voice. Heero laughed hysterically.

"Hee-chan- what does that mean?" Duo asked frantically. "Hee-Chan?" Duo pulled on his loves tank top. "Tell me! KOI!" He pleased.

"It- Its." Heero had to pause between laughs. "Its the fear of-" another laugh. "Thinking! Haha!" Duos composure drooped, if he had any in to begin with.

"Low Trowa- real low." Duo stammered and covered his chest as though shot. "That hurt!" and with dramatic ease he fell back and out of his chair laughing. "Alright alright... what's Quatre Phobia?" They all pondered for awhile on this. The silence was killing Quatre, when out of it all came an answer.

"Virginitiphobia." Wufei abruptly said. "I know that for a fact... it was role play and he still was scared to death!" Heero and Trowa laughed. 

"I remember that! haha!" Trowa was laughing hysterically. "That was so funny, I mean- Quatre was really scared, but it as so adorable!

"What is that?" Quatre asked calmly. Duo wanted to know as well.

"The fear of being raped."

"Oh- yea- but you guys were both SO mean! It frightened me to see you like that! I dont like you mean and rough- I like you soft and gentle, and kind... its more- pleasurable that way." Quatre tried to defend himself sincerely. Duo sniggered at his defense. 

"Haha, that sounded so weird coming out of that innocent mouth of yours Quatre." Duo finally stated.

"Hey! This mouth isn't so innocent any more- watch it, it bites!" Quatre yelped, the last words made Wufei cross his legs, it was so true. Duo stared in amazement at him.

"Uh, what about Trowa?" Wufei struggled to change the subject.

"Trowa... uh..." Everyone once again sat back and tried to think. "Uh..."

"I know I know!" Quatre, who knew very little Phobia names knew one right away. 

"Well- what is it?" Duo asked eagerly.

"Aulophobia." 

"What's that?" Duo made a face with the sound of that.

"Heehee- it the fear of flutes..." and with that they all jumped into a mixture of laughter and embarrassment, each really had phobia- it was so great to know that! Good thing none of them where Homophobic... or had the fear of Ithyphallophobia* or else the next few hours where going to be a hell of fear!

~The End~

* - Fear of seeing, feeling, or having an erection on the account of other men.

(From Mido-Sama: TEEHEE!!!!)


End file.
